Over the last couple of days I have found it much easier to not eat when I'm not hungry.
Is this because I have correctly identified what I am feeling and why? Can it really be this simple?
I know not everyone will agree that their fat has some advantages. I've mentioned this in real life and on various forums and people disagree vehmenently. They HATE their fat, it does nothing for them- they seem almost insulted by the idea that they may be making/keeping themselves fat on purpose.
I imagine most people would be as animated as to the possibility of being scared of being thin. Even more so. I bet they say they long to be thin, there is nothing they want more. I haven't suggested it to anyone except a fellow IEer who is in the same place as I am and she seemed interested. However, she could just have been distracted by screaming children. I need some feedback on this thought.
Anyhow, the fact remains that in the afternoon, when I want to binge, I now know what I am feeling is anxiety/fear of being thin(ner).
So I acknowledge this, tell myself that it will be okay and I will deal with it when it happens. I let myself feel the fear and give myself a mental hug. It's scary but it's going to be okay.
I think this is why I have resisted some of the principles of IE that would be most helpful for me- tune in, put it on a plate, eat mindfully.... Not because I'm worried it won't work for me but WHAT IF IT DOES?? What if I do eat less and lose weight? Diets were fine, I always knew I'd 'fail' at those in the end but IE is different.
So is this THE lighbulb moment for me? I know it is a moment.
We'll just have to see if it's a big moment or a smaller one.